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Acting

How to Rebuild Confidence After a Bad Audition

Acting, Encouragement

Ever left an audition feeling like you just faceplanted off the stage, then tap-danced on your own dignity?

Yeah. Been there. More times than I care to count.

The truth is, bad auditions happen to every actor — no matter how experienced, talented, or prepared. They’re a rite of passage (one that nobody puts on their résumé). And if you’re starting your acting journey a little later in life, it can sting even more. Because it’s not just “Well, that sucked.” It’s, “Did I waste all this time? Was this a huge mistake? Should I just crawl under a weighted blanket and watch British murder mysteries until my hair grows out?”

Here’s the reality: one (or ten) bad auditions do not define you.
But you do need to know how to dust yourself off and rebuild your confidence — otherwise you’ll be stuck in that same dark hole of self-doubt when the next opportunity comes along.

So let’s get practical (and a little philosophical) about bouncing back.

Separate the Art from the Outcome

This is where most actors — especially late starters — get twisted up. You prepare your heart out, memorize, research, embody the character… and then walk into a tiny beige room (or submit a tape from your living room), only to be met with blank faces or a polite “Thank you, we’ll be in touch.”

Sometimes you’re brilliant and you still don’t book. Sometimes you bomb and they call you back anyway. It’s chaos.

Your job? Focus on what you can control.

  • Did you do your prep?

  • Did you make bold choices?

  • Did you show up on time, professional, and open?

If yes, then guess what? You did your job.
The outcome is out of your hands. That’s on them — and on factors you’ll never see (like “the producer’s nephew looks more like the lead”). Free yourself from chasing the result

Do a Gentle Post-Mortem

Notice I said gentle.
Not the savage inquisition you normally run on yourself at 2 AM.

Ask:

  • What actually went well?

  • What can I learn for next time?

  • Was this just not the right role for me?

Then move on. Think like a pro athlete: watch the game tape, take the note, get back to practice. No wallowing.

Get Back on the Horse — Fast

The best way to shake off a bad audition is to book another.
Not the job — the audition. Submit for something new. Self-tape a practice scene. Take a class. Even do a monologue challenge on Instagram. Anything to build new muscle memory and push the last experience out of the driver’s seat.

Because when your last performance is the one haunting you, it’s like your brain freezes in that moment. You need a new “last time” to replace it.

Find a Safe Place to Vent (Then Stop Talking About It)

Have one trusted acting friend, coach, or even your dog who you can unload on. Complain. Rant. Eat nachos. Then — and this is important — stop. Don’t keep telling the story to everyone who asks. The more you replay it, the deeper it grooves into your brain.

Remember Why You’re Doing This

Chances are, you didn’t start acting just for the validation of strangers in folding chairs. You’re doing it because you love stories. You want to play. You’re chasing that electric feeling of truth that only happens when you step into someone else’s shoes.

Reconnect to that — not to whether one casting director thought you were right for a toothpaste commercial.

Have a Toolkit for Shaky Days

This might be journaling, meditation, exercise, reading something inspiring. Or honestly, just laughing at memes about the industry’s weirdness. Have a handful of go-to confidence resets for when your inner critic gets loud.

If you’re not sure where to start, check out Start Where You Are — it’s my guide for actors (especially those of us starting a little later) to get your head straight and keep it there.

Trust That It’s a Long Game

Finally, remember: your acting career is a marathon, not a 30-second sprint.
One audition, one day, one weird casting assistant who didn’t laugh at your joke — none of that has the power to define your whole path. Keep showing up. Keep learning. And keep remembering that you’ve already done the hardest part: you started.

That alone makes you braver than most.

Ready to bounce back?

Bad auditions are just part of the game. What matters is how you handle them — and how quickly you pick yourself up, dust off, and get back in the room. If your confidence is still a little wobbly, I made Start Where You Are exactly for you. It’s a free guide to help you steady your mindset and take practical steps forward, no matter how late you’re jumping into this crazy business.

You’ve got this — and I’ve got your back.

Filed Under: Acting, Encouragement

Why You Might Not Be Ready for an Agent (Yet)

Acting, Encouragement, Wisdom

Every actor wants an agent. I get it. It’s a milestone. A badge of legitimacy. Proof you’re no longer just “trying”—you’re doing.

But here’s the truth:
If you chase an agent too early, you might burn that bridge before it’s ever built.

Agents aren’t looking for potential. They’re looking for proof.
Not that you’re talented (though sure, that helps), but that you’re:

  • Already doing the work

  • Already booking (or at least actively submitting)

  • Already showing up like a professional

In other words: They want to join a moving train. Not push one up a hill.

Here’s How to Know If You’re Not Quite Ready Yet

This isn’t judgment—it’s clarity. If any of these hit home, it might be worth pausing before you start emailing breakdowns.

  • You don’t have headshots that match your type

  • Your resume is mostly blank (or includes high school plays and “mom told me I’m good”)

  • You haven’t booked a role in the past year—paid or unpaid

  • You’re not consistently submitting yourself or looking for auditions

  • You’re still figuring out if you want to do this long-term

None of these mean you’re doomed. They just mean the foundation isn’t built yet.

Why Rushing Can Backfire

Reaching out to an agent too early isn’t just ineffective—it can actually work against you.

If you send an underwhelming submission, they’ll remember it. And when you’re finally ready to try again? You’re already on their mental “not ready” list.

It’s not fair. But it’s real.

You only get one “first impression” with most reps. So make it count.

What to Focus On Instead

While you’re building toward that agent conversation, here’s what actually helps:

  • Sharpen your casting type and brand

  • Get great headshots that reflect that

  • Book a few solid credits (student film, indie short, co-star—anything with a speaking role and footage)

  • Submit consistently on your own (yes, even after you get an agent)

  • Take classes, build relationships, and stay visible

  • Update your materials and track your growth

Agents aren’t the goal. A sustainable career is.
An agent should be a trusted member of your team, not your only plan for success.

Need Help Figuring Out If You’re There?

If you’re still in the “building” phase—or stuck in the “what now?” loop—I’ve got two resources that can help:

  • Start Where You Are – A mindset reset for actors starting (or restarting) later in life

  • The Working Actor Starter Kit – A practical guide to early-stage momentum: bookings, branding, and being seen

Want the full breakdown before you dive in?

  • Start Where You Are – full details

  • Working Actor Starter Kit – full details

Heads up: Some of the links in this post may be affiliate links, which means I may earn a small commission if you buy through them—at no extra cost to you. Think of it as tossing a tip in the jar so I can keep creating helpful stuff (and maybe upgrade my lighting setup).

Filed Under: Acting, Encouragement, Wisdom

Should You Take That Acting Class? A No-Nonsense Checklist (And a Reality Check)

Acting, Training

Let’s be honest—at some point, every new actor asks themselves:
“Should I be taking a class right now?”

And the answer, for most people, is…
Yes. Almost always.

But here’s the catch:
Only after you’ve figured out whether acting is actually something you want to pursue.

And for that? You need to get on a set.

Step One: Make Sure Acting Is Actually for You

Before you sign up for a class, spend a day as a background actor. Seriously. You’ll learn more than you expect:

  • How a working set actually feels

  • Whether you can handle the hurry-up-and-wait

  • What it means to hit your mark, take direction, and stay in character when nobody’s watching

More importantly, you’ll find out if you like being part of that world—or if it just sounds cool in theory.

Once you’ve done that and you’re still excited to move forward?
Then it’s time for class.

What Acting Class Really Gives You

Acting classes aren’t just about learning technique. They’re about:

  • Building confidence

  • Getting honest feedback

  • Practicing in front of people (just like you will on set)

  • Learning how to adjust in the moment

  • Finding community, encouragement, and yes—even friendship

If you’ve never performed in front of a live audience (even if it’s just your classmates), you’re missing a key muscle actors rely on.

In-Person vs Virtual: What’s Better?

If you can take a good in-person class, do it. There’s no substitute for:

  • Feeling the room

  • Reading energy from scene partners

  • Adjusting in real time

  • Being watched (and directed) by someone in the same physical space

BUT—virtual classes can be a great resource too, especially if you:

  • Live in a small town or rural area

  • Work odd hours or care for others

  • Just need to get started before a local option opens up

Virtual classes can still provide structure, feedback, and skill-building—just be honest about your focus. It’s a lot easier to check Instagram during a Zoom scene than when 10 people are staring at you from folding chairs.

How to Find a Good Acting Class

Look for these green flags:

  • Clear structure and curriculum

  • Qualified instructors who still work or stay connected

  • Real scene work (not just theory)

  • A chance to audit before committing

  • Feedback that’s kind, specific, and actionable

  • Transparent pricing and respectful boundaries

Beware of classes that overpromise (“Netflix in 30 days!”) or pressure you into long-term commitments before you know if it’s a good fit.
Upsells aren’t the enemy—bad timing and inflated promises are.

Still Figuring Out Your Next Step?

If you’re just starting out—or starting again after a long pause—you don’t have to rush into a class.

You might need a better map first. One that helps you:

  • Understand the business

  • Avoid beginner traps

  • Build confidence before you spend money on the wrong thing

Here are two resources to help you do just that:

  • Start Where You Are – A mindset-first guide for second-actors and late bloomers

  • The Working Actor Starter Kit – Practical steps to get on set, prep your tools, and move forward without spinning your wheels

Want to learn more before grabbing a copy?

  • Start Where You Are – full details

  • Working Actor Starter Kit – full details

Heads up: Some of the links in this post are affiliate links, which means I may earn a small commission if you buy through them—at no extra cost to you. Think of it as tossing a tip in the jar so I can keep creating helpful stuff (and maybe upgrade my lighting setup).

Filed Under: Acting, Training

From Saddle Wreck to Scritch Whisperer: What Horseback Riding Taught Me About Acting

Acting, Encouragement, Training

When I showed up for my first horseback riding lesson, I was—how do I put this delicately—terrified. I’d watched enough Westerns to know the horse was probably smarter than me.
(And stronger. And faster. And heavier. And judging me silently.)

Fast forward 11 lessons, and here I am:

  • Walking out to the field solo to catch a horse

  • Haltering them without help

  • Grooming (yes, even picking their hooves—gulp)

  • Saddling up

  • Riding with confidence – (In the video below, I’m sitting the trot — which basically means I didn’t bounce off like a sack of laundry. It’s a new skill, and honestly? I’m just impressed I stayed on. Progress.)

  • And then doing the whole post-ride care routine: brushing, de-tacking, leading them back to pasture, and giving out scritches like a cowboy turned Disney princess

I actually look forward to riding now. But I didn’t start out that way.

Watch me go from saddle-shy to scritch-savvy in 11 lessons flat. (Note: No horses were bribed in the making of this video. Unless you count treats.)

And, just in case you were interested, these are the riding boots I bought since my work boots didn’t really fit into the stirrups:

What I’m Wearing:  Ariat Men’s Heritage Roper Western Boot–

These boots have a short upper and a round toe, which makes them easier to move in — especially when you’re not used to cowboy gear. They come in a wide width (a must for me), and they were surprisingly easy to break in. Comfortable, solid, and just stylish enough without going full rhinestone rodeo.

They work great as riding boots and general-purpose work boots. I can even get my big feet into them without a wrestling match — though full disclosure, I did throw my back out trying them on. (Yes, really. Welcome to aging like a stunt double.)

Gear You Didn’t Know You Needed
So, if you’re old like me, you’ll need one of these too (ask my spine):
ZOMAKE Metal Long-Handled Shoe Horn — I use this exact one, and it’s a game-changer. Makes it way easier to get those boots onto my ogre-sized feet without throwing out my back in the process. Comes in a 2-pack, in case you want to keep one in your trailer and one in your regrets drawer.

What Does Any of This Have to Do with Acting?

Everything.

Because learning to ride as an adult feels a lot like starting an acting career later in life:

  • You feel awkward.
    Like a kid in a grown-up’s body trying not to fall off. (Emotionally or literally.)

  • You have to rewire your instincts.
    With horses, you can’t muscle through fear—you have to learn to listen, breathe, and move with intention. Same with acting. The moment you try to control everything, you disconnect from the moment.

  • It’s about trust, not domination.
    The horse doesn’t care that you booked a co-star. They want to know if you’re clear, kind, and grounded. Turns out, so do casting directors.

  • You grow by showing up—over and over again.
    Progress isn’t about one perfect ride or one booked job. It’s about the 100 quiet, messy, beautiful repetitions that come before it.

And just like acting, some days you feel like you’ve got it. Other days the horse looks at you like, “Absolutely not, friend.” That’s the gig.

You Don’t Have to Be Fearless. You Just Have to Be Willing.

Starting anything new as an adult—whether it’s acting, riding, or chasing down an old dream—takes guts. Not because you’ll be perfect. But because you’ll keep going even when you aren’t.

So here’s your reminder:
It’s not too late. You’re not too far behind. And you absolutely don’t need permission to start.

You just need the right tools, a clear path, and someone to tell you it’s okay to be new at this.

Want Help Starting Your Acting Journey?

If you’re curious about acting but don’t know where to begin, I’ve got two things for you:

  1. Start Where You Are – A mindset-first guide to building a career later in life

  2. The Working Actor Starter Kit – A no-fluff resource to help you take your first on-set steps

Both are made for late bloomers like me (and maybe you).
Check ’em out and see what speaks to you.

Heads up: Some of the links in this post are affiliate links, which means I may earn a small commission if you buy through them—at no extra cost to you. Think of it as tossing a tip in the jar so I can keep creating helpful stuff (and maybe upgrade my lighting setup).

Filed Under: Acting, Encouragement, Training

The Audition Rollercoaster: Buckle Up!

Acting, Encouragement

The Audition Rollercoaster: Buckle Up!

Ever had an audition that made you question your entire life’s path?
Yeah. Me too.

Auditioning is like strapping into an emotional Six Flags ride. One minute you’re cruising with confidence, the next you’re screaming inside because you just called the casting director “Mom.”

Welcome to the ride, folks.

The Loops: Confidence, Then Chaos

There’s nothing like walking into a room thinking, I’ve got this, only to blank on your first line like your brain hit a blue screen. Bonus points if you say, “Wait—can I start over?” and the casting director responds with, “Sure… but we’re tight on time.”

We’ve all had those moments:

  • Tripping on the way in

  • Holding a prop upside down

  • Mispronouncing your own character’s name

(Ask me about the time I confidently delivered a monologue… from the wrong script. Bold choice. Not a good choice. But bold.)

The Dips: Self-Doubt and Second-Guessing

After the adrenaline fades, the real ride begins: the waiting game.
You replay every moment in your head—Did I smile too much? Was that a laugh or a weird snort? Did I say “thank you” or “love you”?

Reminder: this mental spiral is sponsored by your overthinking brain. It means you care. It also means you’re human.

If you’re newer to the industry and wondering whether this is all worth it—or how to even start—my guide Start Where You Are might help. It’s designed for actors like us: late bloomers, career shifters, and “what if?” types who still want a shot at the work. For just a few bucks, it walks you through the mindset shifts that make this whole rollercoaster a little less jolting.

The Highs: Booking (or Just Surviving)

And sometimes—miraculously—you book it.
Or you get a callback.
Or they say, “We’ll keep you in mind,” which may or may not be code for no, but hey, it’s something.

Even when you don’t book, you did show up. You got up, prepped, and performed under pressure. That matters. That builds muscle.

If you’re still in the early stages of building that muscle, especially if you’re over 50, my free Beginner’s Guide to Breaking Into Acting After Retirement lays out a clear, honest path forward—no fluff, no ego, just real talk from someone who’s been there.

Tools That Help Smooth the Ride

Want to feel just a little more in control? Having the right tools in your audition kit helps—whether it’s a ring light, a great mic for self-tapes, or a professional backdrop setup. If you’re looking to upgrade your gear, this wrinkle-resistant grey backdrop is one of my go-tos for clean, distraction-free auditions.

Also, if you’re just getting started with self-tapes and submissions and want a step-by-step map, my Working Actor Starter Kit might be exactly what you need. It walks you through everything from your first background gig to building real momentum—with a healthy dose of truth and humor along the way.

Final Thoughts

Auditioning is chaotic, emotional, unpredictable… and kind of addictive. Like rollercoasters, you scream, you cry, you swear you’ll never do it again – Then you’re right back in line the next day, headshot in hand.

So buckle up, laugh loudly, and keep showing up.
You never know which wild turn might lead to the role of your dreams.

Heads up: Some of the links in this post are affiliate links, which means I may earn a small commission if you buy through them—at no extra cost to you. Think of it as tossing a tip in the jar so I can keep creating helpful stuff (and maybe upgrade my lighting setup).

Filed Under: Acting, Encouragement

You’re Thinking About Becoming an Actor? Good. Start Here.

Acting, Encouragement, Getting Started

If you’re reading this, there’s a decent chance you’ve said some version of:

“I’ve always wanted to try acting… but I never knew where to start.”

Maybe you’re 22. Maybe you’re 62. Maybe you’re coming out of a job you hated, or a career that’s winding down, or you just woke up one day and thought, Why the hell not?

Here’s the truth:
You don’t need permission to get started. You just need a plan.
And you don’t need to be young, connected, or classically trained. You just need to begin.

Figure Out What “Acting” Means to You

Acting is a huge umbrella. Are you curious about film and TV? Voiceover? Theater? Commercials? Background work? Improv?

You don’t have to decide everything up front. But knowing what excites you will help guide your first steps.

Not sure? Try everything. Sign up for a class. Audition for a play. Submit to a background casting call. You’ll learn what fits—and what doesn’t—by doing, not Googling.

You Don’t Need Fancy Headshots to Start

Let’s be clear: professional headshots are important—but not on Day One.

If you’re brand new, start by:

  • Taking clear, natural-light photos of yourself (no filters, no sunglasses)
  • Creating a basic resume with any relevant experience (even if it’s just your work history or life skills)

When you’re ready to audition for speaking roles or agents, then invest in pro headshots. For now, be resourceful.

Background Work Is a Legit Way to Start

One of the best ways to get comfortable on set is to start as a background actor (extra).

  • Learn set etiquette
  • See how things work behind the scenes
  • Get paid
  • And most importantly, figure out if this whole acting thing actually feels right

Background work doesn’t require an agent, a reel, or acting experience. Just follow directions, show up on time, and be professional.

Find a Class (But Don’t Fall for a Sales Pitch)

You do not need to spend thousands on some fast-track-to-fame program.

What you need:

  • A reputable class with a working actor or teacher who emphasizes technique over hype
  • A schedule that works with your life
  • A safe space to try, fail, grow, and try again

If you’re nervous, start with a workshop or drop-in class. You’ll get a taste of the work before you commit.

Know the Industry Scams (So You Can Avoid Them)

Quick rule of thumb: if someone promises to “make you famous,” keep walking.

Some red flags to watch for:

  • Anyone who charges you to audition
  • “Agents” who want money up front
  • Schools that make you sign a contract after one free class
  • Acting “conventions” that promise exposure, but mostly drain your wallet

Reputable agents get paid when you get paid. And good training takes time—not pressure tactics.

Rejection Isn’t Personal. It’s Part of the Process.

You will not book every role. Not even close.

But here’s the secret most actors learn (the hard way): It’s not really rejection—it’s selection.

Casting is a jigsaw puzzle. Sometimes you’re not the right shape, no matter how great your performance was. That doesn’t mean you failed. It means someone else fit the piece better.

Learn from it. Then let it go. Move on to the next thing.

Your Life Experience Is a Superpower

If you’re not fresh out of school—congrats. That’s not a weakness. It’s an asset.

You’ve worked jobs. You’ve raised kids. You’ve lived through stuff that gives you depth and insight younger actors can’t fake.

Don’t worry about “catching up.” Focus on being present, real, and connected. That’s what great acting is made of.

You Don’t Need to Be Famous to Be Successful

Acting success doesn’t mean red carpets and magazine covers.

It might mean:

  • Booking your first commercial
  • Performing in community theater
  • Voicing a podcast character
  • Getting cast in an indie film
  • Simply growing in confidence and creativity

If it lights you up, it counts.

Want Help Getting Started? I’ve Got You Covered.

If you’re still exploring the idea of acting, I’ve got a free beginner’s guide designed especially for late starters.

It’s called the Beginner’s Guide to Breaking Into Acting After Retirement — but honestly, it’s helpful no matter how old you are. This short, practical resource will help you:

  • Understand how the industry works

  • Learn what to skip (so you don’t waste money)

  • Take your first real step with confidence

Grab your free copy here

Already know you want to do this — but still battling a few doubts?

Then check out Start Where You Are, my $6.99 mindset guide for actors who didn’t start at 22 and are tired of feeling “too late.”

It’s a fast, encouraging read with zero fluff — just truth, perspective, and a clear reminder that you’re right on time.

Start reading here

Final Thought

There is no deadline on doing something that excites you.
You’re not too late. You’re not too old. And you’re not alone.

If acting keeps calling your name, don’t ignore it. You don’t need a reason or a resume. You just need a first step.

And you’ve already taken it—by reading this far.

Now go take the next one.

Heads up: Some of the links in this post are affiliate links, which means I may earn a small commission if you buy through them—at no extra cost to you. Think of it as tossing a tip in the jar so I can keep creating helpful stuff (and maybe upgrade my lighting setup).

Filed Under: Acting, Encouragement, Getting Started

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